The Art and Science of Self-Reg & Self-Reflection

The trite question “How are you?” has been asked so very often that it has become somewhat meaningless. The automatic “Fine,” reply it typically generates has become equally innocuous.

Has it been asked so often that we generally ignore how we truly ARE feeling at that point in time, or do we assume our simplest answer will allow us to return to whatever we were doing when asked?

The reality is that very few of us are capable of accurately describing “how it is we are feeling.” Being mindfully aware of the signs, symptoms, and signals our body is sending us takes practise. Understanding what may be causing those same signs and symptoms is an important step necessary in our ability to Self-regulate our emotional state.

We can however, practise and grow in our ability to become more mindful of our body’s reactions. These physiological responses/reactions can take many forms and become evident in the biological processes that are part of our daily life.

For example, our circulatory system has its regular resting heart-rate, but how closely do we really play attention to it when we feel it start to accelerate? Similarly, our respiratory system can also be monitored. Are we breathing more quickly with shorter more shallow breaths? Or are we able to take deeper, fuller breaths? Our digestion system can send abundantly clear messages about our emotional state. Is our musculature tense and rigid? or are we experiencing a relaxed less contracted state? Body temperature is also something we can work towards understanding more fully. Do we feel hot or cold?

Here is one way to practise becoming more mindfully aware. It is a “5-4-3-2-1” countdown technique. It’s quick and simple but does require some quiet time/space. In “5-4-3-2-1” you are asked to sit quietly, look around, take a deep breath, and notice 5 simple things you see. Notice 4 soft sounds you hear. What are 3 things you feel? It could be a breeze on your face or your feet inside your shoes etc. Identify 2 different scents that you can smell now or would love to smell. Finally identify 1 favourite taste and imagine that taste on your tongue.

Our body/senses are constantly communicating with us, we just have to take the time to engage, notice and reflect on the signs and signals.